How Bad You Gotta Be? Prodigal Fool Castle Bound Baby

Our two elegantly wasted protagonists, world renowned old school hard rocker Glimmer Twin Keith Richards, wild ass Irish rogue fly tier madman Fletcher Quill are sitting in first class teasing comely high paid waitress's as they wing towards the northern Irish Coast...

" Excuse me Sir, a mysterious note for you Mr. Quill"

" Dear Mr. Quill would you possibly be interested in expanding your position with the Mile High Club? I'm sitting three rows back seat 3A."

" She looks ready for almost anything there Quilly old man! You have any gas left Mate?"

" I Laddy, have spent all me Bullets I'm feared... Might be able to fake it one more time. Did you see the Rack on that pretty thang Dude?"

" Sorry the bother Sir, our Captain would love to have you both come forward ?"

" All righty then, first Mile High then we hang with Cap...... Dam, I forgot to take extra raincoats Dude! Can't ask the Stew, man have to pass on this son. No raincoat, no fun!"

The jet goes into a sudden hard dive and drops 3 thousand feet in seconds, chaos and screams fill the cabin as the crew tries to ruffle First Class feathers..... Our heros' are now laughing and high fiving as the plane struggles to right itself...

" Dude, this is OK hey. Little shake rattle and roll rocker man. Look here I got three grand that says that fat bitch across from us is about to hurl!"

" Quilly, cool Obit if this was it hey Mate? Winging to your castle, chasing the Irish Moon."

" Sir, we are desperately trying to calm everyone down! Would you two international big stars give us a little recital to calm these savage beasts?"

" Oh yeah, we can do that. Keith how about we jump on, " After Midnight", into " Very superstitious" and wind up with, " Tumbling Dice " One two, one two three, After midnight we going let it all hang out, no cross talking action, we going find out what it is all about! After Midnight going shake your tambourine...."

As the shaky jet moves into Northern Ireland air space equally shaky harmonies and well meaning vocals fill the plane with Irish/ English silliness...

The two hour jeep ride to the tip of a long abandoned jetty where Fletcher Quill's beloved castle Raven's Haven covered in grey stone towers reaching over 100 feet stand guard. The long absent master approaches guard dogs first howl then whimper at the sight of six feet two twisted steel and sex appeal long knee length leather coat flapping in the Irish sea breeze...

" My woman, my cat, my castle, my life.... Sharon where are you?"

" Timba, Timba!!!! My sweet best friend! ( ten thousand slightly sandpapery kiss's hit Quill's mug)

" Just as I imagined you and Timba kiss and hug first before the Ball & Chain hey General?"

" You look fabulous la Sharon and feel pretty good too. Sooooo you and Ms. No Panties been girl bonding sweets?"

" She is a kick, up in your fly tower as usual making some crazy thing out of your tying stuff."

" Excuse me Sir, welcome home Sir, it is the Cowboy I presume? " ( President USA Baby!)

" Howdy Marine, you and that whacked ancient rocker all safe and cozy?"

" We tore up first class, General Parker and I are ready to roll in five days. We have all secret codes and personal weapons zeroed in. Parker and I will personally lead one of the three prongs that will take the main city. We are ready to be locked and cocked and on the ground by the 12th!"

" Excellent, now one more thing Marine, you or Parker get whacked going in we need back up Quarter Backs who are savvy to this three prong dealy you two cooked up. Spoke with your main movie star squeeze this morning. She says you have had a Peace Tower built on the grounds?"

" Yes, in a dream an Arch Angel came to me and left plans for the rock tower Peace Temple. It is a replica of the famous California Poet Robinson Jeffer's tower on the coast."

" Oh yeah, Slick Brainy and his sidekick Slick Willy say hello and wish you luck."

" Sharon sweety that reminds me. We will be hosting eight opposing General's in a think tank session before I commit any more youngsters to this meat grinder. Maybe my guardian Angels will help me sort this mess out before its time to point and shoot!"

" So honey love how the hell are things here in me castle?"

" Your stupid Peace Tower is finished and has been blessed by your local Priest."

The prodigal fool and his sweet kitty ajourn to the Fly Tower while La Sharon freshens her Blondness just a taste..... As Quill and his little buddy ascend the spiral staircase leading to the tying room. Quill and his best friend continue the love fest! As the fly tower double heavy wooden doors slowly swing open to reveal our little lost pantyless waif Parris Hilton awfully busy fixing many of the Master's rare flies to a hot tiny leather mini dress.

" You must be the one and only Fletcher Quill Sir?"

" In the flesh my pretty, how goes the locked ankle brigade these days? Not much in the way of trouble here in Raven's Haven I'm afraid. Only loud Sea Gulls and crashing waves. Do have a tiny pub about twenty-five miles up the coast."

" Love your silly feathers Mr.Quill" (As Timba brushs past her well turned leg)

" Dear you must realize these feathers are priceless! The design on that sweet skirt is worth roughly ten thousand. All the scraps and cuttings I see on my floor are worth about the same.That skirt may be the most expensive you have ever owned!"

" Wonderful, now one or two more of the Peacock eye things and there that will do nicely"

" Fletcher I must be loosin my mind here, every so often I see or imagine tiny little people with pointy hats and odd clothes scampering around this room? "

" Yes, they obviously like you or would not allow you to see them. My tiny friends are Fairies who have been with me for many years. They can be mischevious if one upsets! Better be sweet to them and if they do get a bit rambunctious give them pieces of this candy I keep in the top drawer."

" My God, your not kidding are you! Back in Hollyweird I once parked the new Bently in front of one of my favorite hangs. Around 3am as we crawled in for the ride home I saw little people just like these?"

" No offence Dear, may have been the rockit fuel you ingested casting surrealistic smack your way?"

" Ahh here is the Mistress of Raven's Haven, a vision indeed."

" You two finding common insanity sweet cakes? How about waking up the Glimmer Twin and we start this welcome home party right now! Before that happens, come with me Mr. International Badboy I have some very sserious matters to discuss in the priavtude of our boudour Twisted Steel & Sex Appeal..." ( Timba as usual is brushing back and forth on La Sharon's perfect leg.)

Next Month: Castle Games begin -Will three fantastic foursome survive each other?