Peace, tranquility and the ancient enveloping comfort of Raven's Haven have enchanted Fletcher Quill and his best friend Timba the cat. A night of King Salmon sight fly action near the castle walls with Slick Brainy, Jason Aki and Jive Boy kept the boys up until 4am. Jive Boy caught and released a 75 pound super stud King he fooled with Quill's " Karen's Comet " pattern, life as usual is awfully good in Quill's hood... Timba and Quill are up early watching Sea Eagles swoop down on giant bait ball's while tying a new series of streamer patterns tied with famous pubic hairs sent to the castle by the famed Hollywood personal waxing salon " The Bald

Feline". Word is Ophra and Pam and Selma tried to take their hair with them, Quill's on sight spy took care of that post haste! Timba wants nothing to do with this hoard of famous follicles and turns his spoiled nose away.... Secure red phone breaks the concentration...

" Mr. Secretary, what up homey?"

" Good Morning Mr. President, kinda early for our little chit chats sir?"

" Just back from that G8 thing son, still licking my wounds from the cold neck I got from that German Bioooch I tried to neck rub, big ass mistake! Man, she was hot, course Tony and Putin laughed their butt's off."

" Sir, if I may suggest? Perhaps that country boy smooth as honey stuff ain't gettin it on the big stage? Look around the whole planet is coming apart and we got more hot spots then Prince Charlie after Camilla caught him with that twenty year old maid!"

" listen San Francisco Marine General, your last one to give your Commander and Chief advise, I just got word about that clandestine Pubic pilfering operation you pulled off at " Bald Feline ". How low can you go Jarhead?"

" Yeah, Yeah, Mr. President did you watch that video I sent you on Pyramid Power Grid Energy?"

" Slick and I loved that idea, free energy will keep the oil boys on their over fed toes son. How about we keep this discovery quiet until our lab boys tear into this new easy free energy thing?"

" No can do sir, Dali Lama and the Pope already been briefed. Old 666 and his crew are ready to roll this puppy. One more thing sir, just heard from General Parker in Paris, he has contacted his old Vietnam Sniper Spotter " Bigfoot". They sent me a photo of the two of them on their last Nam whack job before it all went up in smoke, it is on the way to you this morning. Duke is about to close out our two sweetheart's when they stroll through the Luxemburg Gardens this week. They keep changing their routines and giving the Dukester the slip."

" Thanks for update, hey man you ever do another chapter for your ' Care & Feeding of your Blond " book Quill?"

" Actually, yes sir I have finished the latest called " Understanding the words little & cute ".

" That is real friggin swell there Marine, gotta bolt have to hang with Slick on his new chopper. Oh yeah, we ran a check on your boy the Abbott Sammy Kinnison and his Golden Gate Park underground faire world. He is one sick gerbil son, he and that other gang of geeks, Tommy the ghost hunter and his crew of ultra hot female helpers are making names in neon. Better keep them under close watch!"

" Excuse me sir, it appears the Dali Lama and Sharon or about to go toe to sandle and need my diplomacy!" ( Staff announces.)

" Gotta roll Mr. President. "

" Sharon what is all the yelling about sweet cakes?"

" I found your holy man here dishing about me with the Pope?"

" Now easy there Blond Goddess, I'm sure it was innocent chin chatter hey Dali?"

" Of course Fletcher, his Holiness wanted Sharon to autograph her latest DVD and I could not help speaking to him about her etherealness, did not mean any harm..."

Another cell call from San Francisco alerts Quill that a serious situation may need his attention pronto!

" Abbott Sammy, is that you wild man?"

" In the almost flesh baby... We got two potential meltdowns all over our Human Interactive Screens this morning. Hard to concentrate with the above ground chaos here in Golden Gate Park. Man, every weekend it's a walk for this a walk for that. Don't these people know I got a show to run down here?"

" Sammy, just heard from the Cowboy, he is all over you like Al Sharpton at a " We are the World Concert", Dude we are about to set a date for the first Tibet kite Olympics. We all want you and Tommy the ghost dude and his biooch's to make the trip. Looks like next month after which we hang in Paris with Duke and Bigfoot."

" I'm down with that, this Pyramid grid energy deal is insane. Man, the oil boys will go goofy over this. Oh, how about letting me borrow the Ferrari you keep out at Sea Cliff, thinking a little trip down the coast would be sweet!"

" I'll get back on that my friend, gotta roll here comes Sharon and Jennifer looking way tooo cute!"

Hotline rings before Blond Goddess comes through the door, " Quill Duke Parker here, man we got trouble Marine! Bigfoot and I just left the Luxemburg Gardens where we stashed my DNA Sniper rifle. Looks like we been compromised, two guys roll up and start running their mouths about being paid to set up your hometown hero Barry Bonds in that steroid bullshit. They say it was all arranged by same people who paid them to confront Bigfoot and me?"

" What the hell, your kidden me Marine, listen up you two keep on task and I will have Abbott Sammy run these boys down pronto! I always knew Barry was a set up, Coopers Town is full of fallen angels much worse then him. Drunks, abusers, fools, liars and so forth deck those halls Dude..."

" Listen man, I want to make this whack happen and get out of Paris, enough of this sissy food and skinny babes."

" General Parker your going to Tibet with us next month to get the Kite Olympics off the ground. Lets get busy and remove the dirt bags Marine. We got world peace to work on before the whole Middle East goes up in smoke Dude! Here comes Sharon again, later."

" Ok fly fool, a call just came in from my old Hollywood hang " The Bald Feline " what on earth are you doing with famous pubic hair you pathetic grave robbing soul stealing lying ass moron?"

Stay tuned for next episode - Blond meltdown? Barry Bonds set up?